Fun in Montana!

We had a super impromptu trip to Montana to visit Aunt Lisa while Daddy is at the cabin with Papa Brian, and we've been having fun!  When the cat is away, the mice will play for sure.  Grace has been having fun playing with Nyssa, and Levi has been such a good little boy.  Both kiddos have gotten sick because they shared with Nyssa's cold (pre-pneumonia) but it doesn't really slow them down!  We took Levi to the walk-in clinic because he's got a really wet cough and is raspy, but after having an x-ray and just seeing minimal clouding, the doctor said he'll get through it without much help.  So we are going to pick up a prescription for an inhaler of albuterol.  We've been just hanging out since the kiddos are sick, but have been making Walmart runs here and there.  Today we'll go to pick up a TON of Easter Eggs and candy because Lisa is putting together a hunt for her neighborhood, and I'm so excited to help her fill them!  We're hoping it warms up enough to take the kids to the zoo but so far, it's been pretty cold.  

 Grace absolutely LOVES this big dog!!  It's super soft so I can understand why.

And she got to get a bag of goldfish because she had such a good morning yesterday (March 23).  And she REALLY likes Nyssa's car!

All in all, a wonderful trip.  We went to Heather's baby shower first in Belgrade on Saturday and headed to Lisa's house afterwards.  The drive was long...the kids had just a little trouble but that's understandable.  The trip I'm worried about is the 6 hour drive home on Friday.  But we'll take lots of stops and everything will go fine.

Amanda

Getting Better

You are doing so much better now from being sick.  We ended up not going to Utah for your Spina Bifida Clinic because you still have a cough, and so we couldn't stay in the Ronald McDonald house.  So we'll go in two weeks.  That means you get to go to school tomorrow and you get to wear your pajamas!!!  It's Dr. Suess' week so you get to have a party :)  I'm pretty excited as well because you have a pair of zebra pajamas that you LOVE and you are going to be so excited to wear them!

Not much has gone on because of you being sick, and now Mommy and Levi are sick as well, so we've really just been hanging out not doing much.  But there is one thing we have been working on, and you've been a big help!  You had a friend in your preschool class, and she's been in your class for the past 3 years.  Well, she's got brain cancer, and is in the Huntsman Cancer Center getting treatment.  We've been working hard on a comfort box full of tons of things from people in the community.  Everyone in the community were just so absolutely loving for her, and they gave so much stuff to her!  Here's what you and I collected together!

We did a great job together, Grace!!  And here is your friend.....

Fight, girly, fight!!!

Amanda

Hospital Visit

Gosh, Grace gets sick SO FAST.  She went from playing with her friend on Friday to a runny nose on Saturday and an absolutely horrible Sunday.  Of course the doctors office was closed so she couldn't be taken in, so we just did what we could to comfort.  That night her breathing was so fast that I thought she had just run a marathon, and the nebulizer treatments weren't doing anything to help.  Come Monday and Grace was still pretty sick.  I turned a show on for her and told her to relax.  I had given her a nebulizer treatment at 4 am but it really didn't help.  After a while the wheezing was so loud that I could hear her from her room.  Not only that but she was BEGGING to go to the doctor.  She'd grab her chest, tell me her chest hurt and ask to go, over and over and over.  I called the doctors office but they couldn't take her in until 1:20 pm!  Seriously?!  Even though I told them she was having trouble breathing?!  So I decided to take her to BYU-I health center. They told me the walk in time wait was an hour long and that's just insane.  Grace is in my arms, crying and moaning and flapping her hands from the inability to breath more than an extremely short gasp.  I said, "so what if I told you she couldn't breath?"  He looked at her and was like, "Oh!  I thought she just had a cough."  Pretty quick he got me in the front of the line, a nurse came out and saw how horrible Grace was doing, and we were taken back within a couple minutes.  Her weight was taken...with a HUGE fight...36 pounds, and then we went to the room.  This is the funny part.  There were two nursing students working with Grace, and the poor girl just didn't want anything to do with it.  After a while she let the alligator nibble on her finger (pulse thing) and after a few minutes the nurses said, "Hm, I think the machine is broken...I need to go get another one."  And then I heard her whisper to the other one "that's too high."  They got another machine and tried again..."Hm...I think it's broken, too."  Seriously girls?!  So they got a different type of alligator bite but by this time, Grace was done with this.  So they tried to manually take her pulse on her wrist...waiting, waiting.  "Well, I can't count them."  "That's just because children's heart rates are so fast."  NO.  It's because she's SICK and her heart is struggling to handle it!!!  So they finally went out and the doctor came in and said, "I don't want you here.  You need to take her to the hospital.  The heart rate is too fast and that's dangerous.  They can do more for her there.  I'll call to let them know you're coming."  And off we went.

There were nurses waiting!  Wow.  And they were the sweetest nurses.  But it was absolutely overwhelming for Grace and I felt so bad for her!  3 nurses rushing around, sticking on monitors on her chest, taking temperatures, putting on pulse things and checking oxygen levels...my poor girl was screaming and flapping and kicking.  :(  What helped?  TV!!!  She watched Doc McStuffins and was calmed down instantly.

Fast forward through a steroid dose, x-ray and breathing treatment and we found out she had bronchitis. I'm so thankful her lungs were clear.  Now it's Tuesday and other than a slight wheeze when she gets too rowdy, she's doing SO MUCH BETTER!!!  And she got to get new cups and a fun box of animal crackers for being such a brave girl in the hospital.  I love you Grace, and I love your strength.

Love you, Girly.

Amanda

Good day Today

It was a pretty good day today.  This morning it was a bit tough to want to get dressed to go to therapy but that makes sense :)  And there was a meltdown at therapy because Grace drew on the table and got into an argument about where people should draw...paper or the table.  But after a few minutes Grace said, "Ok, I'm happy now.  I play with Jeff."  Super cute girl :) 

We went for a walk today and it was the first time Levi was in the stroller for the first time.  It was really tough for Grace because it was HER stroller for so long, and that's definitely understandable.  Grace has done SO well with sharing everything in her life and I'm so proud of her!!!

 This is a picture of my sweet girly waiting to help Levi with his bath.  She so loves helping out with Levi, and is such a great helper.  I try to keep her involved as much as possible so she doesn't feel left out :)

And there we are, ready for our walk!!

Amanda

Catch up :)

So Grace and I finally spent some time in her preschool room!!  It's been ready and waiting for us but it's hard to find time and when there is time...she or I are usually too tired or stir crazy to actually do anything!  Anyways...

03/03/15

This was our exercise since it's too cold to go outside.  She chose a card and we'd do the dance move!

 Here is Grace showing us her lovely version of the chicken dance!

 And then it was time to do a puzzle.  I like these ones because it doesn't have raised edges to show her exactly where the piece goes...they are all meshed together.  She did so well and did this puzzle two times.

 And then one to one correspondence.  I didn't even know she could do this!  Keeps surprising me daily!  

And then just a random picture of her because she's so stinking awesome!  Grace got these pajamas from Daddy and loves them SO MUCH.

I cut her hair by the way :)  It was TOO long and was getting rats nests in it every morning which were then a fight to brush out.  This is much nicer.

03/03/15

This is the same day :)  So, little Grace has ALWAYS had a huge fear of this play structure.  It's in McDonalds.  Actually, she's had a fear of every single play structure we've ever been to (even blow up bounce houses which she's now slowly getting over with gymnastics).  So it was SO amazing to see her climbing around in there!!!  I didn't make it a huge thing when she first started edging to the entrance, which is where that girl is that's kneeling.  I played it off, offered more food when she'd come back, and made it not seem like a big deal.  When she had started climbing up, I nonchalantly walked over to the yellow bubble window to wave because I could see the fear in her eyes, and after awhile, she didn't need that anymore.  And about half an hour later, she'd gone down the slide about 5 times, went into the train to the right of this picture, and just seemed like she'd always played in this structure!!!  It was wonderful to see!

Great job, Grace!!!

Oh, one more tidbit...

We like laying around in bed watching TV.  For this picture, it was Sid the Science Kid.

Amanda

Tough Day

Some days are just tough.  Grace, you get bored and you don't know how to play with toys, have an imagination with them or entertain yourself and it's a real struggle for me sometimes because I need to see that maturity in you.  I want so badly for you to be able to entertain yourself so you can see that it's ok to be independent.  And when I get stressed because of Levi, or because I'm tired, or for whatever reason, you can definitely read it on me and for some reason, wants to push a button.  I struggle so much with myself to not say no, to not tell you to go away, to give me space, or anything like that.  But oh my gosh!  We struggle with each other, and definitely butt heads.  I love you so much...so so much, but this is hard sweet girl.  You don't deserve having all this time stolen from you, and for some reason, we were sent a little boy that just struggles to be happy.  

We need to figure something out Grace.  We need to get to the light at the end of the tunnel.  He needs to be happy and sleep solid hours, and I really need you to be able to entertain yourself for chunks of time so I can have a break.  I know a lot of the stress is coming from me.  I know that, sweet girl.  We'll get through this.  Mama is just tired.  I love you.

Amanda

Budget Meeting

Seriously...where does the time GO?!  I can't believe it's already Thursday!  So, quick recap.  Tuesday Grace's home intervention therapist didn't come because she was "sick," Wednesday Grace had a great day at school and an even better day at gymnastics!!!  She walked across the beam by herself for the first time!!!!  I mean, she's done it before but just a little bit here and there, but after class Coach Cheyenne took her out onto the beam and they whipped it out!

I am SO GLAD Grace LOVES gymnastics!!  What a fun girly :)  I love watching her, especially when she's having fun.  And she loves running to me and kissing me here and there.  I hope she always loves me so much.

Thursday we had the budget meeting and for the most part, all went well.  It's just a stressful event and I'm really glad it's over with, Grace will have 8 hours of therapy (at home) a week (2 hours a day except Thursday) and then her typical 3 hour block of therapy on Thursday, and there's room for respite.

So fun!!!

And guess what?  We are getting Grace into soccer!!

Amanda

Preschool Room

I haven't updated the blog about Grace's preschool room for some time so I guess I'll do that now!  It's going to start having some Levi stuff incorporated into it, so I hope sister doesn't mind!!  I really wish we had three single rooms upstairs instead of just her room and the preschool room because, at some point, Levi will move to this one and then where will the preschool stuff be?  I thought about them sharing a room by why if we have the space?  I could move preschool downstairs but I'm just not into going down there...I rarely do!  Any who, pictures!

 Usually, the pink ball and blue/yellow ball aren't there :)  Then it would be less cluttered.

 Grace makes the letters at school and so of course I hang them up!  They rock!

That empty corner will be Levi's.  I bought a mirror today to lay lengthwise along the floorboard, and I'll put some pictures at eye level that are black and white (they help with brain stimulation).

No matter how many times I call it "Preschool room,"  Grace always calls it "Sewing Room."  Silly girl :)

Amanda

Just Hanging Out

SO we don't really do much different than our typical schedule for the week.  Here's the schedule for now until we get it changed on Thursday because of her increased budget...

Sunday: Church and then nothing

Monday: School and then nothing

Tuesday: Therapy in the evening

Wednesday: School and then gym and then nothing

Thursday: Therapy for 3 hours in the morning and then nothing

Friday: School and then nothing

Saturday: Free day

Busy days!

Here's Levi's schedule:

All days the same...

Eat, sleep, poop, cry (not as much!), play, repeat.

Here's some random pictures of us hanging out!

 Levi: 2.5 months old

And my beautiful girl.  I love you so much, Grace.

Amanda

Days FLY!!!

I can't believe how fast the days fly!!!  Sheesh.  Today we did a total overhaul in Grace's room and totally cleaned out her closet.  Wanna see?

Doesn't it look so much nicer?!  WOW.  That's a lot of stuff...the baby bath seat wasn't in there :)

And here's some fun pictures!!

Hurray!!!  I LOVE THIS GIRLY!!!!!

Next week we have the most wonderful meeting in the world...Grace has now qualified for a higher therapy budget because of her new autism diagnosis...more that 4 times the amount she was receiving!  I am so excited, and this is going to be so great for Grace.  SO we'll meet with a government worker on Thursday to set up what money goes to what (Home therapy, respite, supports for gymnastics/soccer/or whatever else she will do this year, family education, etc).

LOVE YOU GRACE!!

Amanda/Mommy

Cancer

A long time ago, when we lived in California, I had a friend who's little daughter was dealing with cancer.  She was only 25 days younger than Grace and sadly, she just couldn't push that cancer away.

She passed away when she was only 15 months old...

And now one of Grace's little preschool classmates is dealing with Medulloblastoma...I never really got to know the family but Grace's asks where her friend is ALL the time, and it's hard to explain to her that she's sick and in the hospital, plus they moved out of state.  

Little ones shouldn't get sick.  It's not fair.

Amanda

Brother time

Grace got to have some fun time with brother today.  She is so good with him, and I'm so proud of her for being so soft, loving and desirous to be with and around him.

 A kiss for brother during tummy time!!!

Admiring each other :)

Oh, and a friend of mine brought me a Jamba Juice unexpectedly and of course I shared it with Grace??  I don't know who was more excited, me or Grace!

Amanda

Gymnastics

What a wonderful day it was today at gymnastics!  Grace has been going to gymnastics since September 2013, and has worked so very hard to accomplish the tasks expected.  Well, this proud mama can share that Grace walked across the beam by herself!!  Of course I didn't have my phone with me and so I couldn't record this grand occasion, but I swear that it's true.  There were times she'd grab her helper, but for the most part...success!  Skittles were really persuasive!

And she got a green ribbon!!

Good job, Grace!!

Amanda

Bad at Updating

2/17/15

Wow...can you tell how crazy life has been by how few of updates there are??????  This should SO be a priority...I'll get better at it, Grace!!

Today was a really crazy day.  We went to Idaho Falls and left at 10 am...we didn't get home until 4 pm...that ENTIRE time, unless he was sleeping, Levi was scream/crying.

A picture to prove it...

He's shirtless because we had taken him to see an ENT and he pooped all the way up his back...bleh.  Anyways...Grace REALLY gets upset with Levi's crying, and I don't blame her.  It stresses her out, she gets really tense, and starts acting out.  Poor girly.  We try our best to comfort her but there really isn't anything we can do about his crying while we're driving.  She did so great, though, dealing with herself and her being tired.  While we were at the ENT office, she sat quietly the entire time, without us prompting her, and looked at a book they had there.  The ENTIRE TIME.  Usually it's her here and there, everywhere, touching everything, pulling open drawers, crying for stickers, etc.  But she was so calm!  I loved it!!!  I was so proud of her, and she told me she was proud of herself, so that's wonderful :)  Oh, it was SO cute...Oh, and some more information.  We went to a meeting for Grace that had to do with her special needs and developmental stuff, and her budget that she gets through the government because of her needs.  Anyways, after the meeting, we are pretty confident that Grace's budget will increase...all the way to the highest amount bracket.  This is going to be SO good for her because that means more than 2 hours of therapy a week.  And what was so cute is that while I was in the meeting for her, Daddy took the two kids to Sonic and got us all lunch!  When I got into the car after I was done, it was so cute to see Grace in the backseat with her little boxed kids lunch, and she was so proud of per lolly pops (tater tots).  She was just so happy to have this cute lunch!

I love my girl so darn much.  And I had such a great evening with her.  She and I shared noodles together for dinner and Levi was calm most of the evening.  When it was time for me to read to Grace, we took Levi in with us in his vibrating bouncy chair and he hung out with us, listening while I read to Grace.  I softly bounced his chair at the foot of the bed and after a while, he fell asleep.

A great night indeed.

Amanda

Tough Day

The day didn't become difficult until later in the day.  This morning went pretty well...for the most part.  I was wanting to get up early enough that I could have some time to really "wake up" and be more willing to work slowly with Grace and her morning wake up charts.  BUT...when you have a 2 month old, things like that just don't go as planned, especially when he's having issues with colic.  So there was rushing going on and that meant frustration on her part.  Thankfully, we had picked her clothes out last night and that helped us get pass the freakout about having to choose a shirt.  It's tough with that because she's got all the coats on the left of her closet, shirts in the middle, and dresses on the right, and if she's given the chance to "choose a SHIRT," then it's very difficult for her to look at JUST the shirts.  It's too overwhelming with all the other items in there.  Anyways, already had stuff picked out.  Then comes the diaper fight... :(  Sometimes she's ok in the morning, but other times preparation for the day is just so difficult.  But I tried to stay positive and finally, the clothes were on.  Next came the fight to brush her hair and put it up.  This is a fight every time, regardless of her mood.  I don't know if it's a sensory issue or just typical child behavior but she does NOT like standing to get her hair brushed.  Thankfully, Daddy was up and he distracted her while I put her hair up.  Shew!  Breakfast came and she did such a great job eating her oatmeal!  Daddy ate with her :)  And I had to nurse Levi so there we went, we were late to school!  I didn't mind, though.  Just have to let some things go, you know.  Grace was super excited because she had collected 10 box tops and that meant she got to turn them into the school office and get a candy!  She got a giant Pixi Stick!  Boy was she so excited!

Grace-  "Mom!!  Let me show you something!"  

Mom- "What do you have, Grace?"

Grace- "Mom, come here (I bent down).  Ok, (clears throat and pushes hair out of face), I dot a CANDY!!!"

Mom- "That is so awesome, Grace!!!"

Off to class we went.  When she got there she showed her teacher, and then there was a bit of a struggle with leaving the candy in the backpack, but when her helper said she got to wash her hands, Grace was over it :)

I had made some appointments for Levi to see if there was any way we can get rid of this crying/screaming stuff.  It REALLY stresses all of us out, Grace included, and all the attention I have to give him means she's being left out and I don't like it.  So when she got out of school and finished at gymnastics, there was no point in putting her to bed because Levi had to see a chiropractor at 2:30. We ended up letting him take a look at Grace but BOY...from the moment we got there, things were crazy.  Levi was constantly crying, Grace was extremely tired and so she couldn't control her body (constantly moving), couldn't listen, wouldn't stop playing with the table (it moved up and down), kept trying to cover Levi's mouth with her hand (she was really stressed from his crying), or getting into the diaper bag (for ANYTHING or nothing).  Fast forward through the "fixing" of the kids and we were off to the ENT.  Grace was very upset because I didn't give her another snack (she had a green kale pack at the chiropractor--like the applesauce packs but organic greens).  When we got to the ENT place I almost exploded!  I went in to sign in and had a screaming baby in the carseat while Daddy and Grace parked the car.  I have to fill out paperwork and am swinging Levi in the carseat as hard as I could (almost horizontal to the ground---don't worry, he likes the sudden motions).  Then Grace and Brad come in and I give the baby to Brad and Grace is constant at my side..."Mom, I want a snack.  Mom.  Mom.  MOM!!  I WANT A SNACK!!!"  Dad gave her candy..."Mom, I want to eat it.  Open please.  Mom...I want the candy!  MOM!"  I asked her over and over to sit down with dad while I filled out paperwork.  Finally I had to use my mean mommy voice and she folded.  Off to the chair she went but it didn't last long...maybe 1 minute.  Back she came...AH!  Fast forward to the appointment.  She did well in the room after I remembered that I told her she could have crackers.  The appointment was all of 5 minutes and then we were off.  They had a toy wall that she could pick a toy from to take home, and so she picked a rubber squishy ball :)  She actually went to bed with it because she likes it so much.  

Now I'll fast forward.  I figured this would be good to show how our days are...

We got home and things were crazy.  I was fried, Brad was as well, Levi was crying again, and Grace was on sensory overload.  I don't remember much of what happened and it's only 11:18 pm, so that tells you just how fried I was.  I think I turned a movie on for her?  I don't quite remember what I did...we had dinner, though.  She didn't eat much and I'm not for arguing with her to finish.  Sometimes I fight it but today I chose my battle, and I chose to retreat.  Don't know what happened between that and bedtime...shew I'm tired!  Brad got her ready for bed because I was so stressed out about the dogs play fighting together and Grace egging them on while the baby slept and I was desperate for him to sleep, which he was doing.  So he took them into her room and got her ready for bed, and then she came to me and told me she was ready for her books.  We read four books together, she let me brush her teeth, kisses and hugs and off to sleep she went!

Now I should be sleeping since Levi is sleeping, but I really needed ME TIME!  Brad and I have been watching our TV shows and here he sleeps.  He had large bowel movements/gas release, so I guess chiropractic stuff does work.  

Well now Levi is stirring, so I guess I better log off.  I'm really hoping to start having the ability to focus more on Grace again, like it used to be.  Thankfully she still tells us she loves us, so we haven't shut her out...but it's just not the same.  I miss my sweet girl.  My friends tell me she's the same and that I'm dealing with immense guilt, and maybe they are right.  I feel so guilty that she doesn't have enough attention.  But it's my view of enough.  Maybe she feels like there's enough?  This is where I wish I could have a full conversation with her and really ask her, "Are you ok about your brother being here?  Do you feel like you are getting enough attention?  Is there anything I can do to help you more?"

I love my girly with all my heart.  I want her to feel that love.  And I'm trying to learn, every day, how to show her positivity instead of my stress and tension.  I hope I'm not going to effect her long term...and I'm hoping she feels our love.

Amanda

POTTY!

Yesterday Grace was able to stay in dry underwear about 2 hours!  She went potty and so we put underwear on her and I constantly asked her if she had to go.  After dinner I asked again and so we went in and she pottied again and wanted to change her underwear...she was DRY!  So I let her change them and she was in underwear for quite some time until it was time for bath and bed.  Great job!!

Amanda

Developments and Updates!

I am so excited to share this information!!!

Grace is doing so great:

• Grace has started dressing herself more often without me having to physically help her.  She still needs help with her shoes sometimes, and there are times that dressing herself is just too annoying, but she's getting better!
• Grace is asking us to change her diaper when she soils it, which is a step closer to potty training.  She will also potty for Daddy and has started showing interest in underwear.
• She can point out the houses of two of her friends.
• She is starting to learn how to tell someone NO when they do something she doesn't like.

Hurray for Grace!!

Amanda

My Big Girl!!

Here's our sweet girl!

Amanda

Fun With Daddy!

Grace LOVES playing with Daddy, and it's so cute to get pictures of it!  So here's a picture!

Amanda

Madagascar Party!

Grace got to go to a party at her therapy facility, and she had such a great time!  It was 3 hours long and she just loves going to these parties. Well, usually when I pick Grace up, she's fine coming home with me.  But this time?  When I finally found her and said, "It's time to go!" she said, "Um...NO!  I want to stay here!  Go away!"  Over and over she told me to leave, and that she wanted to stay.  I'm so glad she had such a great time, but I was a bit hurt she didn't want to come home.  But not too hurt :)

Here's a picture!

Amanda

Community Event!

01/31/15

We had so much fun at a community event that was going on.  It was a snow party and it included a wagon ride, hot cocoa, scores, snow painting, a polar bear swim (which we did NOT do), sledding, and Elsa was there!  But it was just a bit overwhelming for Grace and so we didn't get a photo with Elsa.

Some pictures!!

 We got to go on a wagon ride and Grace had such a great time!  We went on a big wagon pulled by these two mules, and then we went on a two seater wagon with tiny mules :)

We got to have smores.  This was the warmest place in the whole park...oh it felt good!

This was SO FUN for Grace!!!  There was a huge stack of snow and people had hidden plastic coins everywhere inside of it.  Grace had a tough time grabbing the coins because of her puffy gloves, but after a little help she was able to collect three coins!!  She got to get three prizes...a little container of bubbles, a sticky hand, and a rubber duck!

Amanda